The day Poppo changed
by tmb1112
Summary: Poppo was always out of the drama of the Super Peace Busters, but he still wanted to help Menma chase after Jintan so he followed her out into the woods 'that day'. When he finally sees her, things go downhill fast. Ten years later, the Super Peace Busters are confessing their feelings about why they wanted Menma to leave for their own selfish reasons, and Poppo finally snaps. R/R


Hey everyone this is my first try at an Anohana fanfic. Just finished the show myself and decided to try it out. R/R!

Disclaimer: I don't own Anohana.

"Hey guys shouldn't we follow them?" Poppo asked Anaru and Tsuruko. The other two girls were both frowning and staring at the door to the secret base. The young boy looked back and forth between the two girls but both seemed upset.

Anaru, the one who asked if Jintan liked Menma in the first place, was now sure that he did and it broke her heart. Meanwhile, the black haired girl sitting near her was staring off after Yukiatsu who chased Menma. She always liked him, but he never seemed to notice her, always talking to the white haired girl and even Anaru before her.

"Well," Poppo clenched his fists, "I'm worried about them so I'm going," the boy surprised them by taking off out the door of their base. Poppo was always staying away from any drama the kids had. He never seemed to like any of the girls and was always playing and joking around, but at that moment he had a serious look on his face when he ran out the door.

"Is he okay?" Anaru asked her friend and the black haired girl now looked after Poppo. The boy was sprinting down the trail and she sighed, wondering why they were the only ones not going.

Outside, Poppo ran down the trail for about a minute before he spotted his friends in front of him. _Where's Jintan?_ he quickly realized it was only Yukiatsu and Menma standing there on the trail and he listened in to their conversation to see if they were trying to find their leader too.

Yukiatsu had on a blue baseball cap and was looking under the rim at the girl in the white dress who was staring back at him. Her eyes were focused on the boy so she didn't see Poppo duck behind a tree and watch them from a little ways off. "You're not ugly Menma," the boy stated, "You're..." the kid reached into his pocket, "here."

Poppo couldn't believe what he was seeing as Yukiatsu held out a hair clip for Menma to take. He usually didn't care about the love lifes of his friends, but he could just imagine how much fun he would have telling the girls back at the base. _The looks on their faces, when I tell..._ he froze and his eyes opened wider as Yukiatsu kept talking.

"I thought it would look nice on you. On... the girl I love!" Yukiatsu exclaimed and his cheeks turned red as he held the clip out closer to her. Menma was as shocked as Poppo and she jumped in surprise, her white hair flowing up and then back behind her head as her cheeks flushed red.

She was fidgeting in place and making little noises like she couldn't figure out to say and Yukiatsu stood there looking at the ground and waiting for a response. "S-Sorry!" she shouted.

"What?" Yukiatsu looked up in shock.

"J-Jintan's leaving, so," she pointed behind her in a hurry, "I gotta go after him!" She started running down the trail, "Talk to you later okay?" without waiting for a response she kept going and finally Poppo came out from behind the tree.

 _Everyone knew Jintan liked Menma, and I figured it was the same the other way around,_ Poppo walked carefully towards his other guy friend, "Y-Yukiatsu?" The other child didn't move, he was just staring down the path after the girl who just rejected him. The boy clenched his fist around the hair clip and chucked it into the woods. He spun around and glared up the trail at Poppo who was standing behind him.

"Go," he stated and started walking back up towards the secret base. "I'm sure you just want to chase after Jintan too," he started running off and Poppo considered following him and saying something, but he looked back down after Jintan and Menma and decided.

 _Sorry Yukiatsu,_ the boy thought and sprinted down the trail. He got a little ways down before seeing Menma far in front of him. "Hey Menma!" he called out and ran a little faster.

The girl with white hair was tired from the running and she was panting hard, catching her breath as she walked down the path. "Poppo!" she called out and looked back at the boy with a bright smile. The kid running towards her had a wide grin on his face after seeing Menma's smile and he knew they would find Jintan together. She was thinking the same and spun around pointing a hand down the trail, "Let's go!"

Poppo was only a few feet behind her now and as Menma took a step he realized something, "Menma stop!" he called out but the girl's foot already hit the rock sticking out of the path and she twisted her ankle. She started falling to her left and her eyes went wide as she reached out for something to grab onto. "I got you!" the boy shouted and ran towards her, grabbing on one of her hands and feeling himself getting pulled off the path.

The boy wasn't very strong. He always knew Jintan was stronger than him and Yukiatsu was too. He felt her pulling him down too off the side of the ledge where the stream was down below. Menma looked up at him with frightened eyes as the boy's feet skid a little closer to the ledge the girl was falling off of.

Menma stopped falling with her back towards the ground and one hand up in Poppo's hand. The boy fell to the ground to gain more leverage and used his other hand to grab a root behind him but he wasn't strong enough to lift the girl with just one arm. She was slipping.

"Poppo, help..." the girl whispered and had tears in her eyes. The cliff behind her was pretty steep and she was going to fall in the river after the tumble down the hill. It looked like it was going to hurt.

"I'm s-sorry Menma," the boy said between clenched teeth and he fell backwards where he was pulling with all his strength. He wasn't strong enough to pull the girl up though, her fingers slipping through his grasp. He quickly got up on his feet, staring down off the ledge and watching as Menma hit the ground and then bounced, bounced off the side and hit again but on her head.

"Oof, ouch," the girl squealed as she bumped a few more times and then got air as she lifted up and over the river. One of her sandals fell off and it splashed down into the water at the same time as the girl hit a rock sticking out of the riverbed.

"Menma! Menma!" Poppo kept shouting the entire time she fell. When her head hit the rock his voice caught in his throat and the girl stopped making noises that she was in pain. There was a loud thud from the river and the water around the rock took the white haired girl by the legs and pulled her into the current. There was a streak of red on the rock where she was pulled off and Poppo stared down as the water around her started to get red. "M-Menma?"

His voice was barely a whisper but she didn't respond and his eyes couldn't look away from her. Her body was slowly drifting down the stream and he kept staring as the circle of red around her head grew larger and larger. "This isn't funny," the boy whispered to himself, "Get up Menma. Get up!" He rose his voice but the girl didn't say anything, she kept floating face down in the stream until she bumped into another rock and her body turned over.

The boy staring down at her gasped and his eyes became blurry with water. There was a large gash on Menma's head that kept spewing blood, but the girl's eyes were open, and she wasn't looking anywhere but straight up at the sky. "Menma please..." he stopped talking and watched as she continued to float away. The stream was red for a little longer and he stayed staring down where Menma should have gotten up and laughed off a few scratches. He stared at the rock that still had the blood smear on it even as the river washed away the rest of the blood.

He had no idea how long it had been, seconds, minutes, hours, but suddenly his voice was called out from up in the trees behind him. There were a few people running down the path towards him. It was the Super Peace Busters, minus Jintan... and one more. "Poppo! There you are!"

The kids ran up to him and Anaru got closest, "Are you alright?" She could sense something was wrong. "We figured after you found Jintan you guys would come back to the hideout," the boy never turned his head to her, he was really starting to freak the young girl out.

Tsuruko took a step back. She didn't like this side of Poppo. He was the one they could always count on to be smiling, but his eyes were staring down at the stream and his mouth was open in a look of sheer terror and shock. "Wh-What's wrong?" The black haired girl was usually so composed and it even made Yukiatsu nervous to see the boy like this.

"Poppo," the boy in the blue cap said sternly and took a step towards him, grabbing Poppo by the shoulders. "Where's Menma?" He didn't really care about Jintan, but he figured the boy would have caught up to Menma at least.

At the sound of the little girl's name, Poppo straightened up fast and his head snapped towards Yukiatsu. They could all see the pain and hurt in the boy's eyes and looked down to the stream where he was staring. "She's gone," the kid whispered and they were all now staring at the sandal floating in the stream, stuck between the rock and the shore so it wasn't taken by the current. "She's gone," the children stared at the red stain on the rock and their minds went blank for a second before they all started to cry. Not Poppo though. He stared back at the stream and farther down where he last saw the girl, floating away peacefully on her back.

 _I let her die. I'm weak. I couldn't save her. It's all my fault._

 **Ten Years Later.**

"I wanted her to rest in peace for my own ain, not because I wanted to grant her wish! However, God saw through me which is why..."

"It's the same with me. I'm in love with Menma," Yukiatsu admitted to the rest of the Super Peace Busters. "Even after all this time, the fact is, I love her just as much as I did back then!"

 _It wasn't just me,_ Poppo had his head in his hands as the people around him were shouting about Menma. _She needs to go to heaven. I need her to go to heaven!_

"Tsuruko you're scum too!" Anjou stood up and shouted at the girl. She was blaming herself up until a second ago, but the fact that the black haired girl would rather blame them than admit her own guilt was too much for the orange haired girl to take. Anaru continued in a loud angry voice, "Stop hiding your feelings! Tell Yukiatsu how you feel about hi-" Tsuruko grabbed the other girl by the arms to get her to shut up.

Poppo would have cared that Tsuruko was apparently in love with Yukiatsu, if he wasn't staring at the wood beneath him and screaming in his head. None of them were trying to send Menma off to heaven for her, they all wanted it for themselves. _I really want her to go to heaven. She needs to go to heaven._ He didn't realize it before but none of these thoughts had any care for Menma involved. He just... wanted her to go.

"...I know. I was so jealous of Menma! However you're exactly the same!" Anaru shouted at Tsuruko again.

"That's not true!"

"It is true!" Anaru shouted right back at the black haired teenager. "You were so jealous of Menma stealing Yukiatsu's attention that you did whatever you could so that Menma could rest in peace!"

Yukiatsu was staring at the two girls in shock and Jintan was just as amazed as he watched, but the leader also noticed something else. Poppo hadn't said a word the whole time. Usually he'd try to break it up or make an awkward joke or something, but the large strong teen was sitting there silently with his head in his hands as the others shouted at each other.

Poppo started to twitch as he stared at his hands and he couldn't even hear the others anymore. The image of Menma face up in the water with blood coming down her head was fresh in his mind. Even after all these years. After all the countries he tried to escape to. Even after he got strong so that it would never happen again. Her little body floating away in the stream followed him everywhere he went.

Tsuruko was crying with a falso smile on her face and staring right at the orange haired girl who took a step back from what her friend was telling her. "Didn't I already tell you that you'd be Menma's replacement after she was gone? I wanted to be the substitute! The one who I have always been jealous of... is you Anaru!" Poppo's hands lowered from his face and rested on his legs while the rest of them were staring at Tsuruko in shock at the revelation. "Back then and even now, you were always the one who understood Yukiatsu. I was fed up, so I told Menma everything."

Jintan glanced back over at Poppo who was the only one of them not standing. He was interested in what Tsuruko was saying, especially now that Menma was involved, but his other friend was still staring at the ground in silence.

"She said, 'Menma likes Jintan, but she likes everyone else too!' And in that moment I knew I was no match for her," Tsuruko fell to her knees and the others all stared at her as her tears fell onto the glasses she held in her left hand. "It took time, but I got to the point where I could finally understand Yukiatsu. I was content with just having that. However, even now, the one closest to Yukiatsu is..."

"Tsuruko," the boy she was talking about whispered. He had no idea she felt this way.

"I thought that if Menma were able to rest in peace, and if Anaru got together with Jintan, then I'd finally have the chance to," her voice broke off as her tears flowed harder. She put a hand over her eyes, "That's right, I am a total scumbag."

 _AHHH! Menma why couldn't you just go to heaven! Please,_ the heavyset boy sitting on the steps felt himself breaking down and he couldn't hold it in much longer.

"There was no way it would have ever worked," the rest stared at Yukiatsu as he bowed his head, "We were all trying to get Menma to rest in peace while harboring all these hideous intentions..."

"What's wrong with that?" a low voice said. It was so surprising who it was tht interrupted Yukiatsu that the teen jumped and the others all snapped their heads to the steps. Poppo was grabbing his right wrist tightly with his left hand. His purple button down was unbuttoned fully and his long pants were rolled up almost to his knees. They were all staring at his face that was shadowed more than the rest of theirs and he continued, "Aren't bad intentions better than no intentions at all?!"

They could hear the crack as he tightened his grip on his own wrist further and he winced in pain.

"Wh-What's wrong Poppo?" Anaru thought that the only person there that would be able to say they did it for unselfish reasons would have been the large teenager behind her. Tsuruko even lifted her head from where she was crying and stared at the boy who always acted like a child, just like he did back then.

 _She has to go._ "We need to grant her wish," _Menma!_ The image of her bouncing one last time and slamming into the rock flashed in his mind and he bowed his head in pain, "She has to rest in peace! Otherwise," he shot out of his seat and stared down at his hands as he rose them up in front of him, "she'll never forgive me!" Tears started streaming from the teen's face and he slapped his hands to his forehead, screaming into his palms.

Jintan stared at the man. He was the one who believed him right away when he said Menma was back. He never questioned it and all Poppo did was talk about granting her wish as fast as possible. "Poppo," he whispered.

"I saw it," he whispered and they all stared at him, wondering what he was talking about. "I was there the moment Menma was swept away..." everyone gasped and stared at him. Tsuruko's tears stopped and they all had open mouths as they looked at Poppo. He was such an innocent kid, and he never acted different after it, but now they knew what he was carrying all this time.

"I was scared," he continued, "I was too frightened to stay here any longer. I couldn't run away, even though I tried so hard." He walked down the steps and was staring at his hands, the same hands that let Menma slip away. "I even moved into our secret base! I thought that I'd be able to change if I skipped high school and traveled the world!" he was shouting now and scaring the others who had never seen an angry Poppo before. "But! I always ended up back here! In that base!" he fell to his knees, "Please!" his head bowed to the floor and his arms bent at the elbows as he slammed his forehead into the cement, "Please! Please let Menma rest in peace!"

They couldn't tell if he was shouting at the them, God, or just the world in general, but he kept screaming, "I know it's seflish of me! My feelings may not even allow her to ever rest in peace! But I just can't get it out of my head..." they all stared at the boy and their love problems were growing more and more trivial by the second. "I can't forgive myself for letting her slip through my grasp. The sight of her bouncing down the hill and hitting that rock," he yelled through clenched teeth and his tears were burning his face.

"Y-You saw all..." Yukiatsu stopped and took a small step back. He'd spent a lot of time with Poppo even after the accident back when they were kids. How did he never see the signs?!

"The image of her drifting down the stream going further and further right in front of my eyes!" Jintan stared at the kid and his eyes were huge as Poppo's tears were covering the ground. He shot his head up and stared their leader right in the face with tears covering his face.

Anaru and Tsuruko couldn't take it anymore and buried their heads in their arms, sobbing loudly. Even Yukiatsu had tears running down his face and he turned the other way so they wouldn't be seen.

Jintan was staring up at the sky cursing himself mentally for not wanting Menma to leave either. He knew they were all just being selfish, but she could never leave with them feeling like this. He stared back down at Poppo; the man was sobbing hard and he slammed his head back down on the concrete again.

"Menma, I'm so sorry!" he shouted at the top of his lungs.

"Poppo," a voice whispered from the street behind where Jintan was standing. Only Jintan heard it and he spun around, but Yukiatsu saw the fast movement and stared at the empty space behind the black haired boy.

"Is she here?!" Yukiatsu shouted at Jintan and now the two girls shot their heads up and saw Jintan turned around with wide eyes.

The boy who could see her watched as Menma walked right over and then past him. The white haired girl got on her knees next to the sobbing teen on all fours. "Poppo," she whispered again and this time Jintan swore he saw his friend twitch.

The large boy stopped sobbing loudly and heard the whisper in his ear again. The girl was whispering so quietly that Jintan couldn't hear her anymore, but Poppo felt the wind in his ear every time the soft whisper came. "Poppo, you shouldn't blame yourself," the girl had tears in the corners of her own eyes, it was hard to think her friend had been beating himself up over that moment his entire life, "It wasn't your fault."

"Yes it was!" Poppo shouted and the other teens all backed up at the anger in his voice. They opened their eyes wide as they realized that Menma must be talking to their friend and they wondered why they still couldn't see her. "I was so weak, so small," his voice was like a whimper as he continued, "Whenever I wasn't running I was training and getting stronger. If I had only been back then..."

"I fell off the cliff because I was clumsy," the girl giggled in his ear to make him feel better, "I stepped on the rock and fell off on my own."

"But I could have saved you," the boy moaned and sat up with his head pointed at the stars and tears kept rolling down his cheeks and off his chin. "I caught you," the others stared at him wide-eyed. When he said she slipped through his grasp, they thought he meant metaphorically, but this, this was much worse. "All I had to do was pull you up, but, but," he screamed in anguish and even the ghost of Menma backed up a little afraid, "I dropped you! I didn't just let you die, I killed you Menma! I murdered you!"

"Poppo," Jintan whispered again. His friend was falling apart in front of them, and Menma didn't look like she knew what to do either. So the girl just did what came naturally and she jumped on Poppo's chest, wrapping her arms around his neck and putting her chin on his right shoulder so she could speak in his ear without him moving around.

The boy didn't want to move as he felt the wind wrap around him like small arms. "I killed you. I killed you," he kept whispering and now it wasn't just Menma who had her arms wrapped around him.

Anaru ran up from behind and fell to her knees. She wrapped her arms around Poppo's back and pressed her forehead into the back of his. "It isn't your fault Poppo! Menma doesn't think it is, she never would. No one blames you!"

Yukiatsu felt bad that a second earlier he had the thought to curse at Poppo for letting her fall, but then he realized what the child grew up with. While he felt guilty for making her run away, Anaru felt bad about bringing up the subject that started it all, and Jintan felt bad for making her chase him in the first place, Poppo had real, rational guilt about her death. "You tried," the boy stated and looked down at Poppo, walking towards the larger teen, "You were there for her when I just ran off with my own pain. You tried..."

"But I failed," Poppe said and his tears kept falling. He didn't care that everyone was trying to make him feel better. This was the first time he let himself cry. He didn't back then because if he did in front of the others, they might have known he saw something. He kept it in for years, a whole decade, and now they all knew the truth. "She called for help," he whispered, "she told me to help her and I let her fall."

"You didn't let me fall!" Menma shouted in Poppo's ear. Anaru and Yukiatsu both opened their eyes wide as they could've swore they heard that. Jintan was staring at Menma as she shouted again, "I, I let go!" Poppo's tears stopped and his eyes went wide, "I didn't want to drag you down with me... so I, I let go," she faded off as instead of having its intended effect, Poppo just started to shake.

He was still weak, he would have dropped her anyway, now he just knew that she was trying to save him. It wasn't just his own weakness, she sacrificed herself so as not to pull him with her. "I should have just dove after you, turned us around in midair so it wasn't you but me who hit that rock!" The others and Menma gasped, "It should have been me. I should have been the one who died!"

Ghost Menma slapped Poppo in the face as hard as she could. The teen sitting on the ground felt the slap and his eyes shot down in front of him where they went huge at the sight of the girl sitting in his lap. Her hands were shaking and she was holding the one she used to slap him because it hurt she hit so hard. "M-Menma?" the boy whispered and now the others all stared at him and could see where he was staring.

"Can you see her?" Yukiatsu asked, the jealousy rising back up in him before subsiding when he remembered what was going on.

The Menma in front of him did look a little older like Jintan said. She grew a little and Poppo was staring at her wide-eyed. It was one thing to believe, but seeing her was something he never thought would happen. "Don't ever say that again!" She screamed and everyone heard her though most couldn't see. In a lower voice only Poppo and a shocked Jintan could hear, she continued, "I don't want any of my friends to get hurt. I love you all, and I want you to keep living. I know you tried your hardest to save me..."

The boy opened his mouth to interrupt but she put a finger to his lips, "Shh," she said in a soothing tone and then rested her forehead against his. "I was running after Jintan because he was getting away, I was running away from Yukiatsu because he surprised me, but Poppo. Poppo was there for me when I fell," she whispered in the boy's ear, not wanting to make Jintan feel any guiltier than he did already. "Poppo tried to save me, and what scared me more than getting hurt that day, while everything was fading away," his eyes opened wide, "was how I knew you would blame yourself for what happened. That hurt the most. So please Poppo," she pleaded, "don't go saying you wanted to die. Menma feels sad when you do that," he met her eyes and she was inches away from his face as he stared into them, "Alright?" her smile was back and the girl was awaiting a reply.

Poppo stared at her for a few seconds, and everyone was silent. None of them had any idea what the dead girl just told Poppo, but it had his tears stopped and the ones already on his face were drying out. He started to nod and then a smile tugged at his lips and spread to either side of his face, "Of course Menma!" he said in his usual excited-about-everything tone.

"Yay!" the girl jumped off him and started running around in circles with her arms stretched out to the side. Jintan and Poppo couldn't help their laughter as they saw the girl running around, and soon the other three started laughing along. All of them were so upset a minute before, but maybe they just needed to get all that in the open before they could finally get back to the way things used to be.

 _I'll never forget what I did,_ Poppo was still laughing but he learned how to think sad and look happy ten years ago. _But for you Menma, I'll be happy. I'll send you to heaven for real this time, not for me, but for you._

 **A/N Thanks to everyone who read this one-shot. I just finished watching the show and I couldn't stop thinking about Poppo so I finally decided to write down my version of it. I hope you liked it, or at least got the feels! Feel free to leave a review below telling me what you think.**


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